I m pretty much on schedule. 2 weeks before actual due date.
But I gt a bad feeing my supervisor will bounce back to me with lotsa questions on hw I arrive with the statistics...Heck...let tml worry for itself. I have 3 more reports to complete.
After finishing my draft, I feel so relieved. writing out 6k worth of words is exhausting. This is the first time I did so many literature reviews in my entire uni life. usually only read one or two for each report, but I guess I must have read thru at least 10 this time. Mayb considered as very little for some, but to me alot liaoz k.
After finishing my draft, I feel so tired out. I realised that I have forgotten to eat my lunch. As I devor my lunch at dinner time, I wonder..hmm...hw come I no longer feel hungry after eating 1-2 mouthful...zzz
After finishin my draft, I feel very demotivated though I gt 2 more reports to ideally finish by tonight before I sleep...and yet...I cant get myself to start doing it.
After finishing my draft... mEow feels.... mundane....
Firstly, its fri, and I've been hating Fri-s for a long time tis sem...
Secondly, tis fri 13th, i gt a mid term test.
And of cos, there is the that module's lecture.
I got conduct an interview with a boutique hotel's manager, hope it goes well.
But worse worse for this fri 13th? I jus cracked my glasses.
After many times of squashing to near-break my glasses, I swear nv to leave my specs anywhere bt table. bt jus somehow, smart mEow left it on the bed. As i got up to walk over to grab some stuff, my foot kinda...step on someting and I heard a disgusting *crack*
Freak! yea, tts nt the actual words used, bt u get the idea wad f-word was being used.
I turned back and saw my specs being the 'producer' of the crack sound. I knew someting of it broke. Wadever it is, I dunno, yet, then. Bt definately, noting good cld come outta it, when it went a disgusting *crack* sound rite?
The lens is fine, jus the.... frame, one of the screw broke. Mayb can super glue it back. mayb hafta change a new pair. Or mayb i can wear it with jus one side and start a fashion trend.
Wadever.
Luckily I haf my other pair of 'spiderman-inspired' specs. Bt then..without my tt pair, I no longer haf the teacher-look. Hmm..mayb its retribution for me complainin tt ppl feel I m a teacher.. Noting wrong bout being a teacher, jus I dun lik to b seen as someting I m nt.
One word for today?
SWAY!
Another word for today?
SIAN!
Double S siah... Add a vowel...and makes it even more apt for today.
That makes me feel...y issit tt I m often misunderstood? Mayb nt in the negative sense, but jus sets me tinking.
Some Misconception:
When I m wearing my specs, n-number of times ppl ask me if i m a teacher, or I considered being on. --> I have the teacher look meh? I m not a teacher.
Ppl are shocked and surprised n stunned when I sae I only gt 2 rships. --> I look lik gt alot of ex- n bf-s meh??
The last one dam classic,
My mum passed me a booklet on quit-smokin few days ago. She half believe me tt I dun smoke thoughi hang on to a cigarette box all the time (my wallet). An auntie approached me to ask me bout some cigarette survey. --> I look like a smoker MEH???!!!!!
I look like teacher meh?
I look like v experienced in love-life meh?
I look like a smoker meh??? wtf!!!
I am jus, mEow...Me...why cant ppl jus...see the real me?
The only miconception i dun mind is, ppl mistaking me for a cat. mEow! :P
Hmm...since....since last yr, after I came back from Hk.
After I became single n more freedom I've acquired, I started to drink more often than I had for the past 2X years of my life.
Not that I go clubbin every weekend, or drink everyweek, jus that I drink every few wks, or when a fren celebrates birthday. or sometimes, jus as we sit ard and chill. Last time, I dun even drink. I prob drink only twice in the 4 years I m attached, and before that, I din even drink at all.
Issit of peers influence or jus that we r growing older, drinking is normal? cos I go japan oso drink sakae and stuff... maks me wonder....
Anyway, i found out tt drinkin is nt so good. I put on 3kg and cant shed it for mths. Probably cos I m always on stella. I stopped drinking beer and finally after weeks, I shed the 2kg outta the 3kg. I realised someting, beer is fattening.
I've therefore came up with the decision.
Stop drinking...
At least, stop drinking beer.
And so, I've decided to indulge in wine and whisky n jim beam nxt time. :D
*whoops* Disclaimer: Tis post aint intended for ppl under the age of 16 or 18, whichever is the legal age to drink.
I tink I used up all my energy yesterday being so excited. Cos today, I m so totally tired out.
True, i slept again at 3am, woke up at 8, but hey, I din used to be so tired out last time. Mus have used up all my energy ytd.
Woke up early for my health checkup today. 10am at NUS.zzzz...
Wonder since when i became such a health freak as to go for health checkup every 2 years or so when I din do tt for the past 20yrs of my life.
Here is when I noticed something interesting.
My blood gets shy when someone stares. lol.
Or mayb my blood is jus sleepy like me today.
I watched intently as the nurse inserted the needle into the vein. Then the blood was lik...hmm..slowly flow out, flow out, and den almost stopped...zzz...
The nurse was like, "hmm...very slow hor"...and proceed to press on the needle and attempt to stick the needle deeper...
zzz...
I mean, the vein is there, how deep the needle went will unlikely affect the blood flow right? The vein jus does nt have enough pressure and blood I guess...I was half pissed half curious why my blood is likdat. I now wonder how many HOURS it will take me if I went to donate a pack of blood...
Finally, the nurse make do with jus 1/3 of the last bottle filled. And wahala, I m done..
zzz...
*sleepy*
Bored and went to surf ard the website. Kinda really :( I cant donate blood..hmm..I shld stop trying to lose weight bah..I m jus a few kg from the ideal weight to donate blood... sighz..According to the HSA website, O-group is low in supply, while the rest of the blood supply is at comfortable range.
Please go and donate blood if u can k~
Meanwhile, mEow will try to put on more weight. :D
*anyone wanna treat me to eat food?, in the name of doin good so tt mEow can gain weight and go donate blood? lol!!!!! *
I finally stopped draggin my butt and got down to sending out my resume.
I had aimed to send them out before cny, cos by right our luck is down tis year of cow cow...but had procrastinated till thurs den started drafting them out and den sent them out today.
WOW!
I suddenly feel it is so much easier to apply for job last time. Can easily jus go and click click click. Now every job I apply for, I feel stressed..I feel inadequate...And I will wonder..hmm..shld I? is the pay enuf?
Not that I m demanding a high pay, but I needa pay off my huge student loan... and after spending 4 years slogging, I cant be happy with a pay of jus 1.2k rite?
I remember I was so pleased when I was offered 1.2k last time... zzz....
There is this thick layer of stress... :(
Jobs seemed so easy to get last time..but now...I m not optimistic..though I will keep trying, its not gonna be easy.....
I was in a fairly good mood this morning as I headed off for lessons.
Though I was late, I still strolled over to the canteen to buy myself tea and sandwich as breakfast. That's where the first interesting event happened. As I m putting on the carrier for my tea, an indian came over and tried to take my sandwich, which although I haben paid for, I've considered it to be mine. To make things more interesting, he is already holdin on to a sandwich~
*horrified* - cling on to my sandwich , I look at him and say, "Its mine!", in a very tone that is likened to that of a cat's snarl.
He looked and me and back at his sandwich and went, whoops...
I felt like...erm..abit bimbo then...Getting all defensive over a sandwich, which I haben even paid.
It was in my first tutorial that I felt, and know that my full bimbo-ness for the day CAME right up.
I had jused finished the very easy 5qns tutorial question in the lecture this morning. So its pretty much in a rush. The tutor pick 3 students outta the class of 20 to do 3 questions, which she described as 'straight-forward'. Write on the board for everyone to see...
Indeed, it is very easy, but guess wad, INDEED, I din get it right.
And guess wad?
Its a bimbo-ly mistake.
Instead of 85, I copied it as 86. And instead of -, I used + though I clearly know how to do that question.
I look like a total retard. zzzz.... everyone got it right though. BTW.
I've totally...disgraced myself and make myself the perfect bimbo of the class... zzz
After running off from the class (quite embarassingly due to my bimbo-ism) as soon as the tutor says class dismissed, I half ran-walk to the bus stop. My next class is in 2min. And I din managed to get on the first bus.
I squeeze myself onto the next bus that arrived some 10min later. And guess wad, I m right smack between two...indian workers.... It was here that I almost wished I m the bimbo from Barbie, I have a plastic box like this:
Oh pleaseeEeee Gimme some SPACE and stop squeezing so close to me~~~ Please gimme a transparent box to myself, shelf me in a glass container...
I have this... erm... "jie pi" of needing my personal space, literally, physically and I always feel disgusted and uncomfortable whenever people get too close to me..I need my physical personal space so STOP GETTING SO close to me!!!!!
Omg!!!
That totally spoil the mood for me..
Oh yah, btw, after my lecture for that module , I was went to eat, by myself. And a friendly groupmate-to-be smsed me and say I can join them for lunch after lecture nxt wk if I want.
Nice gesture, but that jus made me feel...like a total anti-social freak who lonely-ly eat by herself, keep to herself... One of those "Table-for-one" incident again...
Women does flip their mood like pages of the book. Jus yesterday I m moody, yet today, I m surfing ard aimlessly lookin at interesting ting..
Was actually surfin ard for yukata, and wahla, look wad I found:
Pretty wedding gowns...and guess wad? On Ebay. And guess wad? All these gowns cost less than 30bucks!
I tink there is someting...fishy about this seller. How can wedding gowns be at such prices? I mean, I cant even get a prom dress than is less than 100bucks. How could it be possible then that wedding gowns are 30bucks????!!!
Almost make me wanna click click click, buy buy buy...
The gowns are so pretty, it almost makes me wanna get married sooner jus so I can wear them...
Last yr, I wore my interesting cheong sum which I bought from overseas for my 初一 CNY visiting.
(awww, i missed my curls~~)
BUT tis yr, I cant wear the interesting yukata that I bought back from overseas...
No wonder sis gave me tt O.o... look when I showed it to her(excitedly)...
I guess I may indeed be one of the worst buys ever, considering the price...
I also conveniently forgot that besides the fact that I rarely get to wear it, wearing it is another problem too..cos given the way it is plus the clogs tt is supposed to be worn with it, I wld probably trip my left leg over my right leg and fall down on a straight road. LOL!
Sometimes, when I help ppl, too much.. I start to tink..if I m being jus a helpful nice person, or a sucker.
人善被人欺，马善被人骑。
I dun wanna reach a situation whereby I m taken as a sucker.
Like, sometimes, some infor is jus widely online. The person jus dun bother to even google, or try to find out. Or learn and den discuss with me wads my opinion about someting. Straight away ask me, wad u tink of tis. Wad is tis. Hw much. Wher to get. Wad is it. Wads the diff.
U noe the best part is. I haf as much infor on the infor as him until I go and google and find out. Bt I did. And he din bother. And jus ask me. Even when I pasted the link. Explain. I guess he din go and read up the features of that 2 item to find out more about wads the diff between the two. Jus ask me, wich one u tink I shld get.
I m not u, hw I noe wad u want? zzz. I can only tel u wad tis haf, wad tis dun haf, and u have to tink. I help u find the infor liao, nw even I haf to use my brains to tink for u cos u cant tink at all?
zzz...
There is no cure for stupidity.
zzzz...
-Rant-
Sometimes, I m jus...sian when tings are easily available online, google and u can get everyting, or jus, flip yellow pages u can get le, but ppl choose the easy way out, jus, without even bothering, ask mEow.
M I a helper or a sucker?
I dunno..sometimes, the line gets blurred.
Not that I dun wanna help. Nt tt I expect someting in return, but the saying,
Give a man a fish, he eat for a day. Teach him hw to fish, he fish for life.
I wonder if I did them a favor, or cause them to be ignorant for the rest of their lives...
zzzz...
when mEow is sleepy, she is grumpy, she bites...zzz...
:(
I m a bitch at times. I m irritatable too. I m mean too. So stay AWAY~
As I tried switching on the lights at 4am in the attempt to finish up my report. To my dismay, it flickered and din switch on.
-.-"'...
I sensed the irony, cos before I took my nap, I was reading this and thinking, wah, when a person is sway, all this can go wrong. Murphy's law.
And guess wad, the nxt ting I know, it happened to me. :(
As I m rushing my many reports, struggling to meet deadlines while juggling my inefficiency and painfully slow pace at producing reports, constipating intensively at my writings, light have to break down.
Suddenly reminded of the few incidents :
Incident 1: When I m trying to fix up uPure
I was twisting using all my might, using spanner stil cannot fix it. Already contemplating calling for help le (the sales person gave me his hp and say if i cant fix, he can come over help me fix up my uPure). My dad suddenly came over and effortlessly twisted off the nozzle, which I was struggling to remove for the past 30min then...I Finally could fix on the uPure.
Incident 2: When the lights flickered.
Yep, incident 2, as described above, I m trying to get some work done and the lights flickered and refused to work.
It is at times like this when I feel, got if house got some guy to help,hw nice it would be. :x
Ok, yah, I m lazy, or incompetent, ok, I admit...*bleah* So, it is at times like this when the thought of jus, findin a man to do the job flashed thru my mind.
So as I m sulking over the need to climb up to reach the living room lights to 'steal' the starter from tt light to fix onto my room's light(while struggling to use my hp to light up the way), I saw little Pig playing by the scratching chair in my room. She is so tiny then, 300gm fluffy pig screaming for milk. And I kinda pretty much single-handedly raised this piggiE (suddenly feel like a single mum).
What cant I do?
After this, I became dam determined to finish the task myself. And I did.
Then, this song flashed into my mind: (ps: lower volume as voice mayb a bit, 刺耳 cos pitch is high)
How would you feel, if u spent more than 50bucks on docs visit to find tt it aint effective? Or tt the docs tell u.. 废话？
Wad I mean by 废话?
Well, wad I mean by 废话 and useless will be when u are bitten by a cat, u are wondering if the wound shld b covered up to reduce chance of infection, u consulted the doc, and the doc tells u "If u tink it is ugly, den cover up loh!"...zzz...
And u noe the best part? I consulted de chinese doc say shld cover up, cos is animal bite, shld cover up to reduce infection and inflammation. Best best part? Bill for western doc is 80bucks. Best Best Best part. Doc din even help me wash while chinese doc say MUST MUST MUST SHOULD have throughly clean wound to reduce infection.
Next Case? When you have persistent swellings on ur leg due to mosquito sting and it looking like big blue black, the doc advice u ways not to get such bad case of sensitive skin, "Dont go to places where u get sting by mosquito loh. And, I think u shld put in more effort to apply mosquito repellent. If nt, den wear long pants. And light coloured clothes".
The treatment session for my sensitive skin infection case became a biology class whereby doc tell me hw mosquito attack ppl wearin dark clothes and a lecture on "Hw NOT to get stung by mosquito"...
ZZzzzz...I was expecting him to tell me hw I can mayb, build up my immunity against such bad cases of infection and allergy. Some pills or someting? BUT NO! nt even tablet to help bring down my 'allergy'. Jus a small tub of cream. Bill comes up to ... sighz..90bucks. :(
And another case whereby I m v regretful bout visiting doc? When I had fever and flu, and I wanna go sentosa the following day so I went doc. The doc prescribed me panadol and flu medicine. zzzz...and the bill? 52bucks.
Wad else? My dad visited a spine/neck specialist for his whiplash problem. Complaining of neck pain resulting in loss of sleep. Guess wad the doc prescribed for him. Yes. Panadol (painkiller)...and? Sleeping pills...smart... zzzzz
Lesson learnt?
mEow shall NEVER visit docs... (as much as possible).
mEow ALWAYS regret going to doc.
mEow always hear ppl say, Insurance 骗钱的！In mEow's opinion, western docs den 骗钱的！
I realised something. I m quite a consistent person when it comes to the tings I like.
Wadda I mean. Well, I noticed that I m attracted to the same kinda of....... things...
Alright, I remember this incident.
I ran all the way to heartland mall all in a rush, and grab a wrappin paper to wrap a gift. When i got back and wanna wrap the gift. I noticed that I have the exact same wrapping paper tucked away, which I bought many many months back, which i have forgotten. So the point here is, even if I may forgot, I will still be attracted to the same design that I buy it again.
Next? Check out Princess Pig's blog. (I think her blog is nicer than mine..*Sobs*) I noticed that though the color scheme is different, the whole layout and pattern is stil similar. Esp the layout. The header, the spacing, the way it is. Its same. Not that I find it easiest to edit such template, but the ting is, this type of template attracts me.
So, I m consistent in the things i like. And I can like it for a long time.
Another example? I eat the same food over and over and over again everyday. Best example, my chocolate ice kachang, and my lavender tea. I can consume this two things every single day.
And lunch, its always the same, if I ask my mum to buy. Its always longton. Or jus, choc ice kachang.
I like a song, I can play jus one single song over and over and over again, for days.
I can like one thing, one person, for a long time. And once I know I love, I will stay true, commit.
But....
Why does it seems like only I can do that? Why cant... ... ... ... ...
Hmm..I shld be sleeping... or doing something more productive rather than emo-ing.
Well... I was jus..watching 1 litre of tears..and well, I guess, lots of things ran thru my mind. One thing I hate about cry-shows..they reminds me of things. And me, I already am tinking too much...way too much for my own good..and thinking of more things...brings...more white hair to me. I needa dye my hair soon. Very soon.
So, I m reminded of things, which obviously dun make me too happy.
Also, I remember that event which cat-fren invited me to. I remember something that was being said that night. About, moving out of the comfort zone. Yes, we are all afraid of moving out of our comfort zones.
Like, now, Pig. Little pig. I m scared. I m worried. I m having second thoughts. Cos, well, for one, my family aint v approving of this 3rd cat. One became two, two became 3?!!!
Another thing is, I m worried hw I m gonna care for this little pig, when sch reopens.
Also, I m worried that my maomao n mewmew hate me. I dun wanna lose their love. I love them more than anything else. Pig, she is cute, but I haben develop that deep a love. For me, and mao, n mew, we went thru so much. If taking Pig means losin them, I rather find an alternative way out for Pig. I dun wanna lose mao n mew.
I m , reluctant, to move out of my comfort zone. To work harder, to make everyone, and everycat accepting of Pig. That even before I try hard enough,I m contemplating giving up.
I m quite ashamed of myself true. That, I'm not willing to move out of the comfort zone. not just in this area, but in other areas too.
We get too used to things. It became a habit. That we dont wanna move out of the comfort zone. Me....seriously, I dunno wad I want. Seriously, frankly. It's been...2mths? I think, I m still... Lost. I dont think I've found the route I wanna go.
I m jus being happy day-by-day. And, not thinking, and not willing to move on, to start thinking what the future lies. I let life lead me by the nose, lead me on. I m letting nature take its course? I dunno. Is this? Or, am I jus standing and on the threadmill... of my shadow? I m just, running in the darkness... Unwilling to move on? Unwilling to move out of my comfort zone?
Seriously, I dunno. I dunno wad I m doing. I dunno wad I wan. I m letting time be the best medicine, but seriously, I guess, I m too much of a planner that not knowing what the future lies ahead, and not knowing what to aim for in future bothers me.
Know the truth? Seriously, frankly, I m not sure if I believe in 'a relationship', and I dunno if I even believe in 'marriage'. Can a guy love a gal, jus a gal, from now til forever?
Yah, I think too much. Way too much for my own good.
Am I suffering from '产后犹豫症' from being mummy to Pig??? lol!
I m pretty much on schedule. 2 weeks before actual due date.
But I gt a bad feeing my supervisor will bounce back to me with lotsa questions on hw I arrive with the statistics...Heck...let tml worry for itself. I have 3 more reports to complete.
After finishing my draft, I feel so relieved. writing out 6k worth of words is exhausting. This is the first time I did so many literature reviews in my entire uni life. usually only read one or two for each report, but I guess I must have read thru at least 10 this time. Mayb considered as very little for some, but to me alot liaoz k.
After finishing my draft, I feel so tired out. I realised that I have forgotten to eat my lunch. As I devor my lunch at dinner time, I wonder..hmm...hw come I no longer feel hungry after eating 1-2 mouthful...zzz
After finishin my draft, I feel very demotivated though I gt 2 more reports to ideally finish by tonight before I sleep...and yet...I cant get myself to start doing it.
After finishing my draft... mEow feels.... mundane....
Firstly, its fri, and I've been hating Fri-s for a long time tis sem...
Secondly, tis fri 13th, i gt a mid term test.
And of cos, there is the that module's lecture.
I got conduct an interview with a boutique hotel's manager, hope it goes well.
But worse worse for this fri 13th? I jus cracked my glasses.
After many times of squashing to near-break my glasses, I swear nv to leave my specs anywhere bt table. bt jus somehow, smart mEow left it on the bed. As i got up to walk over to grab some stuff, my foot kinda...step on someting and I heard a disgusting *crack*
Freak! yea, tts nt the actual words used, bt u get the idea wad f-word was being used.
I turned back and saw my specs being the 'producer' of the crack sound. I knew someting of it broke. Wadever it is, I dunno, yet, then. Bt definately, noting good cld come outta it, when it went a disgusting *crack* sound rite?
The lens is fine, jus the.... frame, one of the screw broke. Mayb can super glue it back. mayb hafta change a new pair. Or mayb i can wear it with jus one side and start a fashion trend.
Wadever.
Luckily I haf my other pair of 'spiderman-inspired' specs. Bt then..without my tt pair, I no longer haf the teacher-look. Hmm..mayb its retribution for me complainin tt ppl feel I m a teacher.. Noting wrong bout being a teacher, jus I dun lik to b seen as someting I m nt.
One word for today?
SWAY!
Another word for today?
SIAN!
Double S siah... Add a vowel...and makes it even more apt for today.
That makes me feel...y issit tt I m often misunderstood? Mayb nt in the negative sense, but jus sets me tinking.
Some Misconception:
When I m wearing my specs, n-number of times ppl ask me if i m a teacher, or I considered being on. --> I have the teacher look meh? I m not a teacher.
Ppl are shocked and surprised n stunned when I sae I only gt 2 rships. --> I look lik gt alot of ex- n bf-s meh??
The last one dam classic,
My mum passed me a booklet on quit-smokin few days ago. She half believe me tt I dun smoke thoughi hang on to a cigarette box all the time (my wallet). An auntie approached me to ask me bout some cigarette survey. --> I look like a smoker MEH???!!!!!
I look like teacher meh?
I look like v experienced in love-life meh?
I look like a smoker meh??? wtf!!!
I am jus, mEow...Me...why cant ppl jus...see the real me?
The only miconception i dun mind is, ppl mistaking me for a cat. mEow! :P
Hmm...since....since last yr, after I came back from Hk.
After I became single n more freedom I've acquired, I started to drink more often than I had for the past 2X years of my life.
Not that I go clubbin every weekend, or drink everyweek, jus that I drink every few wks, or when a fren celebrates birthday. or sometimes, jus as we sit ard and chill. Last time, I dun even drink. I prob drink only twice in the 4 years I m attached, and before that, I din even drink at all.
Issit of peers influence or jus that we r growing older, drinking is normal? cos I go japan oso drink sakae and stuff... maks me wonder....
Anyway, i found out tt drinkin is nt so good. I put on 3kg and cant shed it for mths. Probably cos I m always on stella. I stopped drinking beer and finally after weeks, I shed the 2kg outta the 3kg. I realised someting, beer is fattening.
I've therefore came up with the decision.
Stop drinking...
At least, stop drinking beer.
And so, I've decided to indulge in wine and whisky n jim beam nxt time. :D
*whoops* Disclaimer: Tis post aint intended for ppl under the age of 16 or 18, whichever is the legal age to drink.
I tink I used up all my energy yesterday being so excited. Cos today, I m so totally tired out.
True, i slept again at 3am, woke up at 8, but hey, I din used to be so tired out last time. Mus have used up all my energy ytd.
Woke up early for my health checkup today. 10am at NUS.zzzz...
Wonder since when i became such a health freak as to go for health checkup every 2 years or so when I din do tt for the past 20yrs of my life.
Here is when I noticed something interesting.
My blood gets shy when someone stares. lol.
Or mayb my blood is jus sleepy like me today.
I watched intently as the nurse inserted the needle into the vein. Then the blood was lik...hmm..slowly flow out, flow out, and den almost stopped...zzz...
The nurse was like, "hmm...very slow hor"...and proceed to press on the needle and attempt to stick the needle deeper...
zzz...
I mean, the vein is there, how deep the needle went will unlikely affect the blood flow right? The vein jus does nt have enough pressure and blood I guess...I was half pissed half curious why my blood is likdat. I now wonder how many HOURS it will take me if I went to donate a pack of blood...
Finally, the nurse make do with jus 1/3 of the last bottle filled. And wahala, I m done..
zzz...
*sleepy*
Bored and went to surf ard the website. Kinda really :( I cant donate blood..hmm..I shld stop trying to lose weight bah..I m jus a few kg from the ideal weight to donate blood... sighz..According to the HSA website, O-group is low in supply, while the rest of the blood supply is at comfortable range.
Please go and donate blood if u can k~
Meanwhile, mEow will try to put on more weight. :D
*anyone wanna treat me to eat food?, in the name of doin good so tt mEow can gain weight and go donate blood? lol!!!!! *
I finally stopped draggin my butt and got down to sending out my resume.
I had aimed to send them out before cny, cos by right our luck is down tis year of cow cow...but had procrastinated till thurs den started drafting them out and den sent them out today.
WOW!
I suddenly feel it is so much easier to apply for job last time. Can easily jus go and click click click. Now every job I apply for, I feel stressed..I feel inadequate...And I will wonder..hmm..shld I? is the pay enuf?
Not that I m demanding a high pay, but I needa pay off my huge student loan... and after spending 4 years slogging, I cant be happy with a pay of jus 1.2k rite?
I remember I was so pleased when I was offered 1.2k last time... zzz....
There is this thick layer of stress... :(
Jobs seemed so easy to get last time..but now...I m not optimistic..though I will keep trying, its not gonna be easy.....
I was in a fairly good mood this morning as I headed off for lessons.
Though I was late, I still strolled over to the canteen to buy myself tea and sandwich as breakfast. That's where the first interesting event happened. As I m putting on the carrier for my tea, an indian came over and tried to take my sandwich, which although I haben paid for, I've considered it to be mine. To make things more interesting, he is already holdin on to a sandwich~
*horrified* - cling on to my sandwich , I look at him and say, "Its mine!", in a very tone that is likened to that of a cat's snarl.
He looked and me and back at his sandwich and went, whoops...
I felt like...erm..abit bimbo then...Getting all defensive over a sandwich, which I haben even paid.
It was in my first tutorial that I felt, and know that my full bimbo-ness for the day CAME right up.
I had jused finished the very easy 5qns tutorial question in the lecture this morning. So its pretty much in a rush. The tutor pick 3 students outta the class of 20 to do 3 questions, which she described as 'straight-forward'. Write on the board for everyone to see...
Indeed, it is very easy, but guess wad, INDEED, I din get it right.
And guess wad?
Its a bimbo-ly mistake.
Instead of 85, I copied it as 86. And instead of -, I used + though I clearly know how to do that question.
I look like a total retard. zzzz.... everyone got it right though. BTW.
I've totally...disgraced myself and make myself the perfect bimbo of the class... zzz
After running off from the class (quite embarassingly due to my bimbo-ism) as soon as the tutor says class dismissed, I half ran-walk to the bus stop. My next class is in 2min. And I din managed to get on the first bus.
I squeeze myself onto the next bus that arrived some 10min later. And guess wad, I m right smack between two...indian workers.... It was here that I almost wished I m the bimbo from Barbie, I have a plastic box like this:
Oh pleaseeEeee Gimme some SPACE and stop squeezing so close to me~~~ Please gimme a transparent box to myself, shelf me in a glass container...
I have this... erm... "jie pi" of needing my personal space, literally, physically and I always feel disgusted and uncomfortable whenever people get too close to me..I need my physical personal space so STOP GETTING SO close to me!!!!!
Omg!!!
That totally spoil the mood for me..
Oh yah, btw, after my lecture for that module , I was went to eat, by myself. And a friendly groupmate-to-be smsed me and say I can join them for lunch after lecture nxt wk if I want.
Nice gesture, but that jus made me feel...like a total anti-social freak who lonely-ly eat by herself, keep to herself... One of those "Table-for-one" incident again...
Women does flip their mood like pages of the book. Jus yesterday I m moody, yet today, I m surfing ard aimlessly lookin at interesting ting..
Was actually surfin ard for yukata, and wahla, look wad I found:
Pretty wedding gowns...and guess wad? On Ebay. And guess wad? All these gowns cost less than 30bucks!
I tink there is someting...fishy about this seller. How can wedding gowns be at such prices? I mean, I cant even get a prom dress than is less than 100bucks. How could it be possible then that wedding gowns are 30bucks????!!!
Almost make me wanna click click click, buy buy buy...
The gowns are so pretty, it almost makes me wanna get married sooner jus so I can wear them...
Last yr, I wore my interesting cheong sum which I bought from overseas for my 初一 CNY visiting.
(awww, i missed my curls~~)
BUT tis yr, I cant wear the interesting yukata that I bought back from overseas...
No wonder sis gave me tt O.o... look when I showed it to her(excitedly)...
I guess I may indeed be one of the worst buys ever, considering the price...
I also conveniently forgot that besides the fact that I rarely get to wear it, wearing it is another problem too..cos given the way it is plus the clogs tt is supposed to be worn with it, I wld probably trip my left leg over my right leg and fall down on a straight road. LOL!
Sometimes, when I help ppl, too much.. I start to tink..if I m being jus a helpful nice person, or a sucker.
人善被人欺，马善被人骑。
I dun wanna reach a situation whereby I m taken as a sucker.
Like, sometimes, some infor is jus widely online. The person jus dun bother to even google, or try to find out. Or learn and den discuss with me wads my opinion about someting. Straight away ask me, wad u tink of tis. Wad is tis. Hw much. Wher to get. Wad is it. Wads the diff.
U noe the best part is. I haf as much infor on the infor as him until I go and google and find out. Bt I did. And he din bother. And jus ask me. Even when I pasted the link. Explain. I guess he din go and read up the features of that 2 item to find out more about wads the diff between the two. Jus ask me, wich one u tink I shld get.
I m not u, hw I noe wad u want? zzz. I can only tel u wad tis haf, wad tis dun haf, and u have to tink. I help u find the infor liao, nw even I haf to use my brains to tink for u cos u cant tink at all?
zzz...
There is no cure for stupidity.
zzzz...
-Rant-
Sometimes, I m jus...sian when tings are easily available online, google and u can get everyting, or jus, flip yellow pages u can get le, but ppl choose the easy way out, jus, without even bothering, ask mEow.
M I a helper or a sucker?
I dunno..sometimes, the line gets blurred.
Not that I dun wanna help. Nt tt I expect someting in return, but the saying,
Give a man a fish, he eat for a day. Teach him hw to fish, he fish for life.
I wonder if I did them a favor, or cause them to be ignorant for the rest of their lives...
zzzz...
when mEow is sleepy, she is grumpy, she bites...zzz...
:(
I m a bitch at times. I m irritatable too. I m mean too. So stay AWAY~
As I tried switching on the lights at 4am in the attempt to finish up my report. To my dismay, it flickered and din switch on.
-.-"'...
I sensed the irony, cos before I took my nap, I was reading this and thinking, wah, when a person is sway, all this can go wrong. Murphy's law.
And guess wad, the nxt ting I know, it happened to me. :(
As I m rushing my many reports, struggling to meet deadlines while juggling my inefficiency and painfully slow pace at producing reports, constipating intensively at my writings, light have to break down.
Suddenly reminded of the few incidents :
Incident 1: When I m trying to fix up uPure
I was twisting using all my might, using spanner stil cannot fix it. Already contemplating calling for help le (the sales person gave me his hp and say if i cant fix, he can come over help me fix up my uPure). My dad suddenly came over and effortlessly twisted off the nozzle, which I was struggling to remove for the past 30min then...I Finally could fix on the uPure.
Incident 2: When the lights flickered.
Yep, incident 2, as described above, I m trying to get some work done and the lights flickered and refused to work.
It is at times like this when I feel, got if house got some guy to help,hw nice it would be. :x
Ok, yah, I m lazy, or incompetent, ok, I admit...*bleah* So, it is at times like this when the thought of jus, findin a man to do the job flashed thru my mind.
So as I m sulking over the need to climb up to reach the living room lights to 'steal' the starter from tt light to fix onto my room's light(while struggling to use my hp to light up the way), I saw little Pig playing by the scratching chair in my room. She is so tiny then, 300gm fluffy pig screaming for milk. And I kinda pretty much single-handedly raised this piggiE (suddenly feel like a single mum).
What cant I do?
After this, I became dam determined to finish the task myself. And I did.
Then, this song flashed into my mind: (ps: lower volume as voice mayb a bit, 刺耳 cos pitch is high)
How would you feel, if u spent more than 50bucks on docs visit to find tt it aint effective? Or tt the docs tell u.. 废话？
Wad I mean by 废话?
Well, wad I mean by 废话 and useless will be when u are bitten by a cat, u are wondering if the wound shld b covered up to reduce chance of infection, u consulted the doc, and the doc tells u "If u tink it is ugly, den cover up loh!"...zzz...
And u noe the best part? I consulted de chinese doc say shld cover up, cos is animal bite, shld cover up to reduce infection and inflammation. Best best part? Bill for western doc is 80bucks. Best Best Best part. Doc din even help me wash while chinese doc say MUST MUST MUST SHOULD have throughly clean wound to reduce infection.
Next Case? When you have persistent swellings on ur leg due to mosquito sting and it looking like big blue black, the doc advice u ways not to get such bad case of sensitive skin, "Dont go to places where u get sting by mosquito loh. And, I think u shld put in more effort to apply mosquito repellent. If nt, den wear long pants. And light coloured clothes".
The treatment session for my sensitive skin infection case became a biology class whereby doc tell me hw mosquito attack ppl wearin dark clothes and a lecture on "Hw NOT to get stung by mosquito"...
ZZzzzz...I was expecting him to tell me hw I can mayb, build up my immunity against such bad cases of infection and allergy. Some pills or someting? BUT NO! nt even tablet to help bring down my 'allergy'. Jus a small tub of cream. Bill comes up to ... sighz..90bucks. :(
And another case whereby I m v regretful bout visiting doc? When I had fever and flu, and I wanna go sentosa the following day so I went doc. The doc prescribed me panadol and flu medicine. zzzz...and the bill? 52bucks.
Wad else? My dad visited a spine/neck specialist for his whiplash problem. Complaining of neck pain resulting in loss of sleep. Guess wad the doc prescribed for him. Yes. Panadol (painkiller)...and? Sleeping pills...smart... zzzzz
Lesson learnt?
mEow shall NEVER visit docs... (as much as possible).
mEow ALWAYS regret going to doc.
mEow always hear ppl say, Insurance 骗钱的！In mEow's opinion, western docs den 骗钱的！
I realised something. I m quite a consistent person when it comes to the tings I like.
Wadda I mean. Well, I noticed that I m attracted to the same kinda of....... things...
Alright, I remember this incident.
I ran all the way to heartland mall all in a rush, and grab a wrappin paper to wrap a gift. When i got back and wanna wrap the gift. I noticed that I have the exact same wrapping paper tucked away, which I bought many many months back, which i have forgotten. So the point here is, even if I may forgot, I will still be attracted to the same design that I buy it again.
Next? Check out Princess Pig's blog. (I think her blog is nicer than mine..*Sobs*) I noticed that though the color scheme is different, the whole layout and pattern is stil similar. Esp the layout. The header, the spacing, the way it is. Its same. Not that I find it easiest to edit such template, but the ting is, this type of template attracts me.
So, I m consistent in the things i like. And I can like it for a long time.
Another example? I eat the same food over and over and over again everyday. Best example, my chocolate ice kachang, and my lavender tea. I can consume this two things every single day.
And lunch, its always the same, if I ask my mum to buy. Its always longton. Or jus, choc ice kachang.
I like a song, I can play jus one single song over and over and over again, for days.
I can like one thing, one person, for a long time. And once I know I love, I will stay true, commit.
But....
Why does it seems like only I can do that? Why cant... ... ... ... ...
Hmm..I shld be sleeping... or doing something more productive rather than emo-ing.
Well... I was jus..watching 1 litre of tears..and well, I guess, lots of things ran thru my mind. One thing I hate about cry-shows..they reminds me of things. And me, I already am tinking too much...way too much for my own good..and thinking of more things...brings...more white hair to me. I needa dye my hair soon. Very soon.
So, I m reminded of things, which obviously dun make me too happy.
Also, I remember that event which cat-fren invited me to. I remember something that was being said that night. About, moving out of the comfort zone. Yes, we are all afraid of moving out of our comfort zones.
Like, now, Pig. Little pig. I m scared. I m worried. I m having second thoughts. Cos, well, for one, my family aint v approving of this 3rd cat. One became two, two became 3?!!!
Another thing is, I m worried hw I m gonna care for this little pig, when sch reopens.
Also, I m worried that my maomao n mewmew hate me. I dun wanna lose their love. I love them more than anything else. Pig, she is cute, but I haben develop that deep a love. For me, and mao, n mew, we went thru so much. If taking Pig means losin them, I rather find an alternative way out for Pig. I dun wanna lose mao n mew.
I m , reluctant, to move out of my comfort zone. To work harder, to make everyone, and everycat accepting of Pig. That even before I try hard enough,I m contemplating giving up.
I m quite ashamed of myself true. That, I'm not willing to move out of the comfort zone. not just in this area, but in other areas too.
We get too used to things. It became a habit. That we dont wanna move out of the comfort zone. Me....seriously, I dunno wad I want. Seriously, frankly. It's been...2mths? I think, I m still... Lost. I dont think I've found the route I wanna go.
I m jus being happy day-by-day. And, not thinking, and not willing to move on, to start thinking what the future lies. I let life lead me by the nose, lead me on. I m letting nature take its course? I dunno. Is this? Or, am I jus standing and on the threadmill... of my shadow? I m just, running in the darkness... Unwilling to move on? Unwilling to move out of my comfort zone?
Seriously, I dunno. I dunno wad I m doing. I dunno wad I wan. I m letting time be the best medicine, but seriously, I guess, I m too much of a planner that not knowing what the future lies ahead, and not knowing what to aim for in future bothers me.
Know the truth? Seriously, frankly, I m not sure if I believe in 'a relationship', and I dunno if I even believe in 'marriage'. Can a guy love a gal, jus a gal, from now til forever?
Yah, I think too much. Way too much for my own good.
Am I suffering from '产后犹豫症' from being mummy to Pig??? lol!
Mundane mEow
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